Monday, November 16, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Ever felt of the regard that is particular to what you were, rather than what you have become? When all that is talked about are how you were, rather than the present you? That being a swan is rather just a smokescreen of the ugly duckling that you were way down the past? That the hard work is never significant, as anyway - you are still looked upon as you were?
Why is it that more often than not, once poor always a poor? Why is it so hard to get over the stigma of a label which for-all-I-care may not even be essential whether it have ever existed at all? Is it more of a culture, or just the effin’ way of life?
Everyday, we happen to come across at certain situations, and all we can do is sigh. It’s like; “Damn, what more must I need to prove to somehow be recognized and belong.”
“Being born poor is never wrong, but to perish as one must be”. Those words were told a gazillion times already, and it is what motivates people in pursuing life in any form. Some work it out the hard way, and the others would choose shortcuts. In conclusion, the end shall always justify the means anyway. Some are judged how one struggled, while some are never judged at all. And this could be the bitter part of it.
There are just those who choose not to check on the fruits, but rather would prefer to shoot on the weathered trunks. It is frustrating that appreciation of the experience would not even come into play. It could be throbbing, but what people prefer to see is the old you. Maybe because they got familiar to it, and it is easier to deal with what they were cozier of, and that any new things you could offer would not be important at all, and no one would care.
Maybe a sting of insecurity from their end, but that you shall never know. They won’t even give you a shot it. At the back of their minds, they already passed way down the road of what you have just started to hit. So, no big deal. There’s really nothing new after all.
So that for the ‘deprived’ from the humblest beginnings, they would take life’s challenges squarely. During family gatherings, they are seen on the sides while the alpha dogs are belting their tunes with their wine glasses. It is not that they have wanted those corners, but that was the social treatment that they are accorded. But it is helpful though – because it boosts their adrenaline to vision what they would want to be.
So that they would be strongly driven with a rock-steady determination to leap over the hump. They would dream for a better future, and the only partaking required from their hearts is the resolve to deliver. And in their own standards, they would push their little frames to succeed. And they shall be. And themselves would be grateful.
But the sting of the social order is just so unfair. Going back into those family affairs, those who must have enjoyed seeing them on the sides decades ago still would crave to put them back there. There is no premium to what they have pulled off. They still see the holes in their clothes, or the mud on their faces. The blueprint was already framed in their mentality. What an attitude…
That when the self-proclaimed elites have their own events, the achievers would be invited – with a pronouncement that they shall be hated to their graves if they would not show up. Wow, they would be suddenly recognized! And so, in reciprocation to that exceptional treatment, of course they would go - only to find out that they don’t even have an assigned table, finding themselves being squeezed-in into non-relatives. And the second time they shall exchange pleasantries is when they have to leave (or sometimes, in response to their badly hurt sentiments, they would rather not budge, and just walk away and be gone).
And when it is the underprivileged guys’ turn to send an invitation, them cream of the crop shall out of the blue be as busy as hell. But make no mistake; as if to make you feel any better, comes the assurance that they will get back to their schedules, and try very hard to come down. As if there was nothing important in your life when you accede to their invitation. As if you are always free to their calling. Yes, it is so surprising how comfortable for them to turn down a warm incitement – but as if such was not expected at all though.
Yet them dark horses also have to uplift their developed principles into their improved personalities. They have to feel special too. They have to reward themselves. And when they just don’t seem to fit to the usual pack…
That is when they have to create their own circle, and re-align their league. They try to seek their own level. They become resolute that a fresh start is believed to be far better rather than to sneak into the old system that seem to be so imprudent. It is only then that they can establish who they are at present, how they want to be properly addressed and recognized and reap the labor of hardship. They bail from a union where they are never given a chance to feel somewhat exceptional, with the due respect that they must deserve. Because if life’s cycle is relatively linear, they should not be steadily downstairs. Not that they want to see their old script from other people, but only to give commence of what they have accomplished.
There are just things that go-getters can never get hold of, respect included. Not because it is not worked for, but just an irony to the philosophy that watching the paint dry does not necessitate a change in color. Some things are just bound to be irrepressible.
And in cases as such, you shall find yourself as another victim of unfortunate circumstances. And the only thing that can change perceptions is within.
Inarguably that it may not be the same in all situations, but that can be the surest thing to do to feel better. For what could be your ultimate goal in life – if not to be happy?
How to leap over the label hump? Bail out, and launch anew. Ctrl-Alt-Del.
But if it is thought that it should not be that way, then there is always the free will. As reality would dictate, in life there are no options. Only choices.